


Hopeless Romantic

by sparkinside (boomersoonerash)



Category: Hanson (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, California, Celebrities, Cell Phones, Clubbing, Concerts, F/M, Female Friendship, First Meetings, Friendship, Grammy Awards, Homophobic Language, Letters, Long, Love, Middle of Everywhere Era, Musicians, Phone Calls & Telephones, Romance, Shout It Out Era, Song Lyrics, Wine, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-12
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-02-01 09:35:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12702180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boomersoonerash/pseuds/sparkinside
Summary: Miranda Larson is a successful pop singer whose life gets thrown for a loop when she meets Taylor Hanson.





	1. Intro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I think — I think when it’s all over, it just comes back in flashes, you know? It’s like a kaleidoscope of memories, but it just all comes back. But he never does. I think part of me knew the second I saw him that this would happen. It’s not really anything he said, or anything he did. It was the feeling that came along with it. And.. crazy thing is, I don’t know if I’m ever gonna feel that way again. But I don’t know if I should. I knew his world moved too fast and burned too bright. But I just thought, how can the devil be pulling you towards someone who looks.. so much like an angel when he smiles at you? Maybe he knew that, when he saw me. I guess I just lost my balance. I think that the worst part of it all wasn’t losing him, it was losing me._
> 
> _I don’t know if you know who you are until you lose who you are._

10/27/17

Dear Taylor,

I did an interview today. What's new though right? I'm doing interviews every day except the interviewers don't usually ask about you. But this one did and I was floored because I didn't know what to say.

How did I answer her question on if my fifth album was about you or not? I couldn't really because would it be fair to do that. I don't think it would be so I didn't.

It did make me want to write you this letter though and tell you what I couldn't tell the woman interviewing me. Yes, my album is about you. Who the hell else would it be about?

Surely not Nick because he isn't deserving of much anymore though I guess maybe neither are you after everything but you were it for me. My one true soulmate so I guess it's only fitting that I write about you and what we had together. That you're my muse as well as my poison for destruction.

You should be so proud of yourself. I know your ego will love it as it always loved getting stroked and taking compliments and there I go getting catty.

I didn't want that to happen. I just wanted to send a simple letter to you so I guess I should end it before it happens again.

I truly hope you're happy and that New York is treating you well. Though I think Los Angeles misses you just a tad.

Yours, Always and Forever  
Miranda.


	2. The Lucky One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _And they’ll tell you now, you’re the lucky one_   
>  _Yeah, they’ll tell you now, you’re the lucky one_   
>  _But can you tell me now, you’re the lucky one, oh, oh, oh_
> 
>  
> 
> _Now it’s big black cars, and Riviera views,_   
>  _And your lover in the foyer doesn't even know you_   
>  _And your secrets end up splashed on the news front page-"The Lucky One" by Taylor Swift  
> _

1/14/11

Miranda sighed softly to herself as she sat backstage in her dressing room at the Staples Center. The venue where she'd be performing her last show of her third tour.

The nerves already settling inside of her bones. Regardless of how many times she had done this before. Every night she went on stage it was just always the same with a repeat of her being a mess each and every hour up until showtime and then killing it during the concert.

Then again of course she was bias when it came to herself and how she did in concert. She was allowed that she was sure of that much.

"Hey Randa," Prue's voice sounded as she walked into the dressing room. Her arms full of takeout boxes from a local Chinese food place. "Have you heard who is coming to the show tonight?"

"You mean besides you?" Miranda questioned as she quirked her eyebrow. Looking at the girl who had been her best friend since seventh grade in middle school. When they had bonded over how much they hated the head cheerleader. Mainly because she was dating the boy they both had a mutual crush on.

But their crush on him evaporated once they had realized how much of an asshole he had been.

Prue let out a sarcastic laugh as she walked to a table in the room, sitting the take out boxes down. "Yeah I mean besides me," she retorted with a roll of her eyes. "I mean a fucking celebrity."

Miranda was the one laughing now, "Celebs come to my Los Angeles show every tour," she shrugged knowing them coming here gave them much needed press. "Why would I care about someone who just needs press for something?"

"Because this guy is someone you used to have a celeb crush on back in the day," Prue shrugged as she grabbed two boxes before walking to the couch where Miranda sat. "It's Taylor Hanson," she revealed and yeah maybe Miranda cared now.

Because back in the day she had the biggest celebrity crush on him. Had even daydreamed about marrying him like every other girl on the planet.

Dreams that ended when Taylor had gotten married to some southern girl in his teen years. Though they had divorced two years after the wedding when it was revealed Taylor hadn't been the father of the baby that was the reason they got married.

But of course by then Miranda was out of her Hanson phase and now well here she was a celebrity in her own right. A celebrity who had a boyfriend named Nick.

Nick who was somewhere in California today but not here at the venue yet. Maybe wouldn't even show up because he claimed he was busy with his own stuff. He was a model after all and had stuff he had to do.

The pitfalls of dating someone in the entertainment business too.

"I knew it," Prue spoke in Miranda's silence sounding so gleeful. "You're excited at the prospect of Taylor being at the show tonight aren't you?"

Blushing Miranda looked at Prue wanting to lie but Prue was her best friend. Prue knew her so well and she'd know if Miranda lied.

Miranda nodded her head slowly as she felt herself grin, "Just a bit," she admitted. "But I think I'm also more shocked. What are the odds my childhood crush is actually coming to see me in concert?" she asked trying to wrap her head around that.

But it was a hard concept to wrap her head around.

"Why wouldn't he come?" Prue asked like it was a no brainer. "You're awesome and you're about to start work on a fourth album soon. You sell out tours. Anyone would be stupid not to come and see you, even Taylor fucking Hanson."

Rolling her eyes Miranda only shook her head. Not sure if she believed she were that awesome. Especially when most of the celebs who came to see her only did so for their own fame and press. To get stories in the media and it wasn't nice being used.

But Miranda was too nice to call them out publicly but sometimes she did rant on the phone to her mom and sister who were both back home in Arkansas.

The only two people who knew her better than Prue did.

But then again it had been her and her mom and her sister ever since her dad had left them for his secretary. Her dad only showing up on birthdays and holidays.

"Yeah, yeah," Miranda muttered out. "Enough talking though and more eating," she said as she opened the box Prue had brought her. "I need to stress eat before performing in front of my old celebrity crush tonight," she sighed still feeling like this was hard to wrap her head around.

Taylor Hanson was actually going to be in the audience tonight. She was only praying tonight wouldn't be the night she fucked it all up.

That she didn't fall or misremember a lyric. That would be awful for her she just knew that.

She'd feel awful too messing up in front of Taylor. But then again maybe he wouldn't notice. Maybe he was only coming to get press for something.

Hanson could have had an album out and she may not have noticed. It wasn't like she had much time to be a fangirl anymore.

Not with her own fast paced life.

A life that hadn't slowed down since she was sixteen and had released her first album. Catapulting her into stardom and fame almost unexpectedly and it hadn't slowed down even now that she had just turned twenty-one.

It was everything she wanted yet sometimes tiring at the same time. But at least she had made most of her childhood dreams come true.

Except she hadn't won a Grammy yet but her team was hopeful that next month would be her month. Though every time she told Nick that he laughed and told her not to get her hopes up too high.

That there were more deserving artists than her.

*****

"You're so lucky," Juliet crooned from the other end of the line of the phone and Miranda had to roll her eyes at her sister's words. "The cute Hanson boy coming to your show," she giggled and sometimes it was hard for Miranda to believe Juliet was the youngest child.

Not when she teased her like she was the eldest one.

"Shush your mouth Juliet Faith," Miranda told her sister in a fake stern voice. "I'm not lucky. He's probably just using this concert as promo of some sort."

"For what though Mimi?" Juliet asked using the nickname that only her and their mom used. Everyone else just called her Miranda or Randa. "Hanson have nothing new coming up. I know because I'm a fan," she spoke sounding smug.

Her confession confusing Miranda because how had she missed that her sister was a fan of Hanson still? A big enough fan that she knew stuff about them like that.

She had always thought she and Juliet were close but maybe she was wrong. Maybe living out in Los Angeles and being on the road and in a studio for so many years had ruined their closeness.

It would make sense. Miranda had seen it happen with other celebs. Their relationship with families falling apart because of the pressure of this lifestyle.

"I didn't know you were still a fan."

Juliet laughed so loud that Miranda had to move the phone away from her ear for a few seconds. "Of course I'm still a fan you dummy. Someone in this family had to be after you stopped once Taylor Hanson got married and you ripped all your posters down in a fit," she said again teasingly reminding Miranda of her past. "Are you going to tell Taylor about that Mimi? I think you should."

"And I'm going to hang up on you," Miranda told her with an annoyed sigh. "I have soundcheck soon anyway."

"Sure you do," Juliet said as if she didn't believe Miranda. "Just you'll do well tonight Mimi. Believe in yourself and rock Taylor Hanson's world or at least his eardrums."

"I'll try Juliet," Miranda said truthfully because she would try. She was just afraid of failing miserably. "Goodbye," she said waiting until Juliet said it before hanging up.

Laying her phone down on a table Miranda stood from the couch, leaving her dressing room to head to the stage for sound check. Knowing most of her band had probably beat her to the stage.

She was always the last one there. Not that she tried to be the last one it was just she always ended up calling her mom or Juliet right before soundcheck was about to start.

*****

Standing backstage minutes before showtime Miranda huddled with her band as they said a little prayer. The small group soon heading to the stage after the prayer was over and the moment she was on stage and the lights were on her it was as if all her worries had subsided.

Even if she did chance a look over at the section where the celebrities were which was probably a bad idea because when she did look she saw Taylor but it wasn't just Taylor who had came. All his brothers were there sitting together.

As well as some redhead who was sitting next to the oldest Hanson brother. The one who she had once written a song for way back when and if anyone ever asked her if it was about Isaac she'd lie.

It wasn't like he was her favorite Hanson but he had just been the easiest to write about. Especially when putting her crazy feelings for Taylor into song back then would have been impossible.

Still would be today because seeing him again even from the stage well maybe she could see why she had such a crush back then.

Her teenage self had done well when it came to him looks wise anyway.

*****

After the concert Miranda just looked longingly up at Isaac and Zac who it seemed she had the luck to talk to backstage as some of the celebrities had stayed for a mini after party that her crew was throwing. Her tour manager Mindy more than likely being the one to tell the big known names about it.

Miranda also knew she could have chosen to talk to Taylor as he had came back with his brothers but she had chosen not too.

Afraid that she'd say something stupid if she tried.

"So how come you guys decided to come to the show tonight?" Miranda asked as she looked between Isaac and Zac.

Almost wishing she hadn't asked that. Knowing she may not like the answer that they gave her but the question was out there so it was too late to take it back.

Isaac smiled big as he turned to the redhead who was standing closely beside him. "Because my wife Iris here is a huge fan and she kept pestering us to come to one of your shows for months," he laughed and all Miranda could do was smile.

The sight was a cute one, seeing the way Isaac looked at Iris like she was his Queen.

"He's only saying that because he was the last one to relent. Taylor being the first," Iris spoke in the way only a wife could when she was teasing her husband.

Miranda's feelings doing something funny when she knew that Taylor was the first one to relent first out of the three.

Nodding her head Miranda fell into a comfortable conversation again with Isaac and Zac as well as occasionally Iris who was silent mostly.

Miranda didn't think Iris was shy though she just got the feeling the poor woman was a bit starstruck which was funny since Iris' husband and brother-in-laws made Miranda that way.

Before she knew it though Miranda found herself back with Prue huddled to the side of the room. Miranda knowing from the look on Prue's face that she wanted to tell her something.

"So, Taylor invited us to go out to a club with him and Zac after the afterparty ends," Prue spoke sounding giddy with excitement and from the way she said it Miranda just knew that somehow whenever Prue had spoken to Taylor he had worked his magic and her best friend had a crush on him too.

"They club?" Miranda asked almost surprised by that though she shouldn't be. Everyone who was anyone in California did.

Prue nodded her head, "Yep and Zac's girlfriend who had to miss the show tonight is going to be there. According to Taylor she's a huge fan and wants to meet you," she revealed and her words too did funny feelings to Miranda's feelings.

Miranda feeling kind of let down that the only reason Taylor wanted her to go was because of Zac's girlfriend. But then again Miranda had Nick and she had no reason to feel such things from a silly not so dead childhood crush.

"But Nick..." Miranda started only for Prue to interrupt.

"Nick's off doing whatever the hell Nick does. He didn't even have time to come to your last fucking show so he doesn't deserve you caring what he will think about you going out to have some fun," Prue told her sternly like her mom would have if her mom had been here. "Anyway I want to go just to get a few dances from Taylor and I'll feel weird going without you Randa," she spoke sounding not the least bit shameless.

Shaking her head Miranda knew she'd go. If only to make Prue happy.

"Fine," she conceded with a sigh. "I'll go so you can get to dance with Taylor," she said teasingly but this time teasing her friend was different.

The Miranda whose long dead crush on Taylor which was slowly coming back was a tiny bit jealous. Jealous that Prue could be this way with Taylor because she was single and also because she had the ability to talk to the man whereas Miranda couldn't.


	3. Gorgeous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _You should take it as a compliment_   
>  _That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk_   
>  _You should think about the consequence_   
>  _Of your magnetic field being a little too strong_   
>  _And I got a boyfriend, he's older than us_   
>  _He's in the club doing, I don't know what_   
>  _You're so cool, it makes me hate you so much (I hate you so much)_
> 
> _Whisky on ice, Sunset and Vine_   
>  _You've ruined my life, by not being mine-"Gorgeous" by Taylor Swift  
> _

1/14/11

Sitting in a booth in the packed club that she had semi unwillingly not wanted to come too, Miranda was at least somewhat relieved that they had VIP access as well as relieved that it seemed that Zac and his girlfriend Annika who went by Annie for short weren't as into this scene either.

As far as she could tell they looked as bored as she did and from what Annie had said moments ago Taylor had been the one to rope them into this.

Just so that Annie could have some fun and maybe meet Miranda since as Annie put it she was as much of a fan as Iris was.

"You're a fan of Hanson right?" Annie questioned Miranda who smiled as she came out of the thoughts she had been lost in. "I read an interview once where you mentioned liking them."

"I was a fan yeah," Miranda nodded her head as her smile grew a bit more as she once again remembered her fan days.

How many posters she had on her wall. How most of them had been of Taylor and how she was half sure even after ripping them down that she had put them away and saved them. Which meant they were somewhere in her mom's house.

If she knew her luck Juliet had found them and was one day going to use them as blackmail.

"What made you stop being a fan?" Zac interjected as he looked at her curious. "You said was which means you no longer are."

Annie playfully swatted as Zac's arms, "Stop being a creep you doofus," she teased him. "Maybe she just got bothered by your presence and had a slip of the tongue," she defended and it was a better reason than what Miranda had.

Because how pathetic would it be to admit she had started losing interest when Taylor had gotten married? Even if it had been short lived because his bride had lied.

Miranda shook her head as she tried to come up with a believable lie. "I guess my life just got busy with my own career that I couldn't keep up," she spoke hoping it sounded plausible to Zac.

But for some reason he seemed like the most stubborn Hanson. So knowing her luck it wouldn't be plausible at all.

Zac looked at her as he remained silent and Miranda could see the war raging inside of his brain or it felt that way since he clearly showed his emotions on his face.

He was deciding though it seemed on whether he believed the lie she had given him or not.

"Fair point," Zac finally spoke deciding to believe her lie. "But dare I ask which one of us was your favorite?" he questioned.

Miranda blushed at the question too because never in her life had she felt more put on the spot than now. With Zac asking who her favorite was. She also knew there was no way she could tell him or Annie. Not with Taylor in this club somewhere.

Probably still on the dance floor with Prue. She just had a feeling if she told then Zac would tell Taylor because besides seeming like he was the most stubborn he also looked like he'd be a big mouth.

After all he had asked her two rather personal questions in the span of minutes.

"Isaac," Miranda lied again. This time her answer was so quick that she wouldn't blame him if he saw through it but at least she did have the song she could always pull out as proof to back up her lie.

It wasn't Zac though who called Miranda's bluff.

"Really?" Annie questioned with a raised eyebrow. "Most girls tend to go for Taylor," she started until Zac cleared his throat and Annie rolled her eyes. "Okay now they go for Zac but back in the day they went for Taylor and you seem like you'd be a Taylor girl."

Miranda blushed but before she had time to answer Annie. The girl got a text on her phone which stole her attention away from Miranda.

Miranda feeling curious on who was texting Annie when she pulled a weird face before looking directly at Miranda.

"So this is going to seem weird," Annie started off sounding hesitant. "But Taylor says he wants you out on the dance floor," she spoke.

"Taylor really texted you to tell Miranda that?" Zac asked though he didn't sound surprised which made Miranda wonder just how many times Taylor did things like that.

Annie nodded her head before giving Miranda what looked like a sympathetic smile. "He doesn't bite I promise," she told her and Miranda laughed.

It wasn't Taylor biting that she was worried about. It was making a fool of herself in front of Taylor, of course she didn't voice that though.

Instead she stood from the booth and headed out of the VIP area out onto the dance floor where she spotted Taylor instantly because even in a crowd he stood out like a sore thumb or maybe his magnetic force just drew her in.

Taking a deep breath she headed over to him, surprised that she saw Prue nowhere in sight.

"I have the feeling you've been avoiding me," Taylor spoke over the music the moment Miranda made it over to where he was. "I mean I get you have a boyfriend but that's no reason to avoid me," he told her and he was lucky he sounded like he was teasing her with his last comment.

Otherwise she would have left then and there. Regardless of how much the inner teenage Miranda was dying on the inside because Taylor Hanson was talking to her.

Was looking at her like she was the only other person on the dance floor.

"You think that's why I am avoiding you?" Miranda asked him sarcastically. Giving the teasing back to him as good as he had given it to her. "Don't give yourself a big head there Mr. Popstar."

Taylor rolled his eyes, "Yeah, yeah but I mean honestly I was beginning to feel left out," he admitted. "Talked to both my brothers but left me out in the cold."

"They seemed much more approachable," Miranda shrugged her shoulders. Hardly believing that she was still talking so casually to Taylor.

Like he was someone she talked too every day.

He wasn't and probably never would talk to her again after this.

Taylor made a fake hurt looking face, "Ouch," he spoke as he shook his head. "Your words wound me pop princess," he said teasing her with what the media called her.

The it girl. The pop princess.

"You probably deserved it," Miranda told him as she smiled seeing Taylor return it and there was her heart doing a weird fluttering sensation in her chest.

Something it hadn't done since she met Nick at his twenty-eighth birthday when she had only been nineteen.

Smirking Taylor nodded his head, "Probably," he conceded as he stepped closer to her. Miranda feeling like her body was on fire just from his closeness. "How about letting me buy you a drink?"

Pausing Miranda looked at him knowing her mom would lecture her about this. Letting a practical stranger even if he was her celebrity crush buy her a drink in a club.

But when would she get the chance again?

"Sure," she agreed feeling Taylor's hand go to rest on her waist as he lead her off the dance floor. "Where is Prue at?"

"I think she left me alone on the dance floor when she saw I have two horrible left feet," Taylor told her so nonchalantly that she almost doubted his words.

She wanted to call his bluff but she didn't. Instead she took a seat beside him at the bar, hoping against all hope that no one noticed her or him.

Didn't want this to wind up in the press because she knew they'd make the wrong assumptions and Nick would be angry.

He'd be angry anyway once he found out she had went out to a club without him but this, if he knew she was alone with Taylor would make him worse.

Especially if the press caught wind and tried to say they were dating or being romantic.

They weren't even if Miranda knew she wouldn't mind if they were. Which had to make her an awful girlfriend she knew.

After she had sat down Miranda remained silent as Taylor ordered them both drinks. An action she was used to from men because Nick did it to her all the time. Even before she was really old enough to drink, since she had just turned twenty-one last month.

It was only after their drinks arrived that the silence between Taylor and Miranda was broken. "So you're a fan of the band?" Taylor asked and for the second time tonight she was put on the spot by a Hanson brother who had done his homework on her.

"I was yeah," Miranda answered using the same wording she had with Zac. "Life got busy and I sort of lost track of you guys though with my own career," she shrugged deciding to divulge that and save herself another question like Zac had thrown at her earlier.

Taylor's face remained neutral at that. Miranda wishing he was easier to read like Zac had been.

"Makes sense," Taylor told her as he took a drink of the beer he had ordered himself. "Which of our songs was your favorite?" he asked and well at least this question was easier than who her favorite brother was.

Because if Taylor had asked her that she wasn't sure she'd have been able to lie like she had with Zac.

Taking a drink of what Taylor had ordered her Miranda sighed. Glad to see that it was a strawberry daiquiri. One of her favorite drinks virgin or non virgin and maybe he had done his homework on her rather well.

Knowing her favorite drink and everything.

"Penny and Me," Miranda finally answered. "Pretty sure Underneath was the last record of yours I owned and Penny and Me is probably my favorite song you guys have. It was just one I could relate to well," she said hating that it was probably a generic answer but it was what it was.

She was telling him the truth.

"Figures," Taylor told her in between drinks. "You seem like someone who would like that song."

Arching an eyebrow Miranda just eyed Taylor wondering what he meant by that. "Should I be offended by that?" she asked him curiously.

Though a part of her felt like she didn't have to be. She just wanted to make sure.

"No," Taylor smiled as he shook his head and once again there was her heart doing weird things in her chest. "It just means you're probably into the manic pixie dream girl type of songs and characters," he explained and maybe it made sense.

Maybe she was into that. She had never really sat down and examined what kind of stuff and things she liked.

She liked love though, she liked romance and fairy tales and dresses and just everything girly. She liked writing about her feelings and life.

That was as much as she really knew about her likes but maybe after tonight she'd examine her likes more.

Taking another drink from her strawberry daiquiri Miranda decided to change the topic of conversation. The whole conversation becoming easy after that or maybe it was just the alcohol.

All Miranda really remembered was having an intense discussion with Taylor about the types of fans there were and which types were the best to have. The really dedicated ones or the not so dedicated ones.

Time just seemed to fade until Miranda finally looked at her phone and frowned realizing how late it was and deciding she needed to leave, regardless of wherever Prue had went off too.

"I should go," Miranda told Taylor watching as he just looked at her sullenly like he didn't want her to leave or maybe she was reading too much into it. "It was really nice talking to you though," she spoke hoping he could hear the sincerity in her voice.

"Wait," Taylor told her as he reached for her phone, "I want to give you my number. Just to you know talk about fans again," he said though she could tell there was a teasing in his tone. "Or maybe we can get together to write sometime."

Miranda felt like her heart stopped at his last statement. Unable to process that Taylor would actually want to write music with her.

"Well in that case I think it's only fair I give you my number too," she replied with a tiny grin as she reached for his phone which was lying in front of him.

Picking it up she easily worked her way through it putting her number into his phone and handing it back to him as he handed over hers.

After taking her phone she moved to leave finally. Working her way through the crowd of people, telling herself that Taylor wouldn't contact her. That he probably just said what he did to say it.

But god would it have been cool if he did call her.


	4. Cold As You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending given to a perfect day_   
>  _Just walk away, no use defending words that you will never say_   
>  _And now that I'm sitting here thinking it through_   
>  _I've never been anywhere cold as you_
> 
> _You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray_   
>  _And I stood there loving you and wished them all away_   
>  _And you come away with a great little story_   
>  _Of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you-"Cold As You" by Taylor Swift  
> _

2/13/11

Taking several deep breaths Miranda looked at her reflection as she stood in the hotel room she had been in most of the day. Getting ready for one of music's biggest nights.

Now she was ready to leave at any moment just as soon as her boyfriend finished his final touches in the bathroom. His getting to come with her being something that hadn't been planned on but his schedule had cleared up in the last few days and he had been able to come.

Which Prue was thankful for Miranda knew because Prue had made it known a week after the Los Angeles show she didn't want to come. Something Miranda found odd but Prue had been acting odd ever since the night at the club or more like ever since as Miranda had predicated the media had somehow found out about it.

Saying that she and Taylor had seemed more than friendly and accusing her of cheating on Nick. Which was crazy and of course she had tried to tell Prue and Nick both that but it seemed neither believed her for their own reasons.

So Miranda was sure Prue was probably convinced that Miranda somehow was trying to ruin her chances with Taylor, something that was crazy. If anyone had ruined it, it was Prue herself since she had seemingly disappeared from the club and Taylor before Taylor had texted Annie asking to talk to Miranda.

Hearing the bathroom door open Miranda turned her head, seeing Nick coming out as he adjusted the tie he had on.

"I don't know why we're going," Nick muttered out as he turned his gaze to Miranda. "It's not like you'll win any of the awards you're up for and we'll just be sitting there pathetically. Like you do every year you've been."

Rolling her eyes Miranda crossed her arms over her chest like a child would during an argument. "Well no one said you had to come with me Nicholas," she told him rather sternly. "I can just go with my team and have a good time like I do every year," she said watching as Nick blushed at her words.

A sure sign that he was angry or embarrassed that she was putting him in his place.

"I do have friends in this business you know," she continued which was partly true. She did like some people but she kept most of them at a distance.

Having learned over the years that everyone had an agenda. Everyone just used everyone for something and hell even sometimes she had done it too.

At the request of people on her team.

Nick stayed silent for the longest time after Miranda got done speaking. Miranda almost afraid for what he would say as long as he was silent for.

After all she knew Nick had a temper. Everyone knew Nick had a temper, it was why everyone was surprised when they started dating.

Not because of their age difference but because she was known as the good girl and he was the bad boy model with a horrible temper.

A temper that she had always wanted to tame but never could.

"I'm going because I want people to shut up about you dating that damn Hanson," Nick finally told her which in ways maybe she had suspected that.

Wondered when he told her that his schedule was free if he had pulled strings just to go and be seen with her. So the media knew they were still together. Supposedly still very much in love.

Even though their love usually felt more like hell the longer it lasted.

Swallowing a lump Miranda did her best to keep her emotions in check. "That is a very shitty reason to come," she told him before walking towards the door. Shoulder bumping him on her way. "I think I'll go by myself," she said as she opened the hotel room door.

Stepping out of the room she calmly shut the door and walked to the elevator. Wishing that she could cry but she didn't want to get to the limo which was waiting outside only to have her make up woman yell at her for ruining her hard work that she had done.

But Miranda really wanted to cry even if she knew she couldn't.

*****

"I knew you could do it," Bridget who was one of Miranda's band members greeted her as she came back to the audience after her first ever Grammy win for Song of the Year. "I knew this year would be your year."

Miranda laughed as she just hugged Bridget back wishing that Nick had as much confidence as one of the members of her band.

"I was hopeful," Miranda told her as she just hung onto Bridget for a bit longer. "But we still have one more award I'm up for. The biggest one yet that I could still lose," she spoke as she heard Nick's taunting voice in her head. Telling her that she wouldn't win album of the year.

That she wasn't cut out for album of the year.

Bridget pulled away from Miranda, eyeing her like she thought she was crazy. "You'll get it," she told her before sitting down and Miranda sat down with her.

Picking up her purse and getting her phone out to see if she had a message from Nick. A part of her hoping that Nick had been watching.

That Nick saw that she had finally won a Grammy and that he had been wrong. She was good enough for the awards she was up for.

But her heart fell a little when she saw no message from him. So she just put her phone away and did her best to forget about him and just be in the present moment.

Be here at the awards but her mind it seemed didn't want to do that at all.

Which meant she sat there and thought of Nick for the rest of the night. Completely missing when the winner of Album of the year was announced at least until Bridge nudged her arm and looked at her expectantly.

Miranda looking at Bridget confused until she realized what was happening. She had actually done it. She had won album of the year.

Just feeling shocked she stood from her seat. Going through the motions almost in a numb sort of shock as people hugged her and congratulated her on her way to the stage.

Making it to the stage she took the award and just looked at it briefly. Smiling as she took a deep breath before giving her speech.

Thanking her team and her family as well as God. But above all she thanked her fans. The people who made it possible for her to keep living her dreams.

After giving her speech she left the stage where she was met backstage by some people from her team.

"We've already booked the reception hall of your hotel for an afterparty," Jackson told her as he looked up from his phone. "It's recommended you attend even if you don't want too. We've already been informed Britney Spears is going to come."

Miranda felt her smile fade at that. Of course she was expected to go, of course she was expected to rub arms with people.

Continue what was done best in this business and use people.

But well at least it seemed sometimes it paid off like it had tonight with her winning. She finally won two Grammy's and again all she wanted to do was get back to her purse.

She wanted to see yet again if Nick had been watching. If he saw her win a second time, this time the biggest award she could have got.

She really hoped he had and she hoped he felt dumb for all he had ever said about her not winning. Really hoped he was eating crow in their hotel room.

*****

Pouting Miranda sat off in a corner of the reception hall, knowing she wasn't doing a good job of mingling with people. Not when she was currently holding her phone and waiting for a text or a phone call from Nick. Anything to prove that he had seen her big moments tonight.

That he was sorry for how he had treated her but so far there was still nothing and once again tonight she wanted to cry because of him.

At least now if she cried she didn't have to worry about ruining her makeup. Now all she had to worry about was someone leaking a story of her crying at her own afterparty so she kept herself together.

Promising herself that she'd cry as soon as she reached her hotel room. Probably when she was in the middle of confronting Nick if he was even still in their hotel room.

Knowing her luck he had probably left after she had stormed off on him earlier in the evening. It would be a Nick thing to do.

When she felt her phone vibrate in her hands Miranda looked down. That hopeful feeling building in her chest that maybe it was Nick texting her coming on again.

But it evaporated the moment she saw the alert that the message was from Taylor. Her eyebrow raising as she opened it cautiously because surely it wasn't that Taylor.

There was no way it was him. Yet as she read the message he had sent her she knew it was.

 **Taylor 11:45**  
My brothers and I were watching from Isaac and Iris' tonight. You did so well. Congrats on the win Miranda :).

Rereading his words over again all she could do was smile. As well as want to use this message as a fuck you to Nick when she did talk to him.

Tell him that at least Taylor Hanson could message her on the biggest night of her life. That he congratulated her before her own boyfriend did.

Maybe go one lower and tell Nick that if Taylor were her boyfriend that he'd have apologized way before Nick had. Whenever Nick did.

If he even did that was.

Shaking her head Miranda chose then to turn off her phone. Decided then that she was going to go out and mingle. Screw Nick and whatever he was doing right now.

Because at least some people were happy for her. At least her childhood celebrity crush was happy for her and maybe in the end that was all that mattered.


	5. Should've Said No

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _You should've said "No", you should've gone home_   
>  _You should've thought twice 'fore you let it all go_   
>  _You should've known that word_   
>  _'Bout what you did with her'd_   
>  _Get back to me (get back to me)._   
>  _And I should've been there in the back of your mind_   
>  _I shouldn't be asking myself, "Why?"_   
>  _You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet..._   
>  _You should've said "No", baby, and you might still have me- "Should've Said No" by Taylor Swift_

2/14/11

Waking the next morning Miranda frowned as she sat up in an empty bed. A bed that had been empty when she arrived back in the hotel room and was still empty. Having offered no clue as to where Nick had went and Miranda herself had no clue as he hadn't texted her.

She knew he'd be back though because his things were still in the room. There was no way he'd leave for good without them but as she looked at his bags she couldn't help but get a bad feeling. Like that when he came back she wouldn't like where he had been.

Then again Miranda knew the rumors. That he had cheated on her before but she chose not to believe them since most came from the tabloids and they were known to lie.

That and Nick had been her first love. Her first everything and she stubbornly wanted to hold on even if it meant getting hurt by him.

Though she knew if he had cheated and she had it confirmed she'd leave him. She'd be done for good because she didn't do that. Had saw how her mom took it from her dad before he left for the secretary and she didn't want the same thing with her own love life.

Miranda refused to be anyone's doormat like she refused to be anyone's other woman. She just could never hurt another female. Not with how she saw her mom react to her dad.

She never wanted to put a woman through that.

Though a part of her was afraid that even with her convictions that she would wind up doing it one day. It was like her worst nightmare really and sometimes they came true.

Shaking her head to come out of her own thoughts Miranda slipped out of bed. Going to her suitcase to get a change of clothes and shower.

Hoping that when she got out of the shower that maybe Nick would be back and they could talk. They needed to sit down and talk.

Get past what happened last night if they could. If they weren't too far past being repaired or not.

She couldn't help but feel they might have been though again she was stubborn. Wanted to hold on to Nick for dear life even if it was an impossible dream.

*****

Coming out of the bathroom Miranda stopped in her tracks when she saw Nick sitting at the table in the hotel room. Not shocked that he was back but she was shocked how casually he was sitting there drinking a coffee. Not even looking guilty or sorry for having been gone all night.

"You won," Nick stated with a tiny smile as he turned to look at her and at least wherever he had been he knew that much.

That or he heard about it at some point this morning.

Miranda nodded her head as she stepped farther out of the bathroom. "I won twice," she added on as she went to put her pajamas in the bag with her dirty clothes. "You were gone when I came back last night," she retorted finally bringing up what she felt had been an elephant in the room.

"Where were you?" she asked as she turned to face him again after her dirty clothes were put away.

Nick visibly inhaled and the way he paused in answering her made Miranda nervous for his answer. An answer that didn't come as he just continued to sip away at his coffee. Acting like he expected her to just forget what she had asked him.

She wasn't that kind of person though.

"I asked where you were," Miranda spoke again as she stood up and walked closer to where Nick was at. "Can you please tell me?"

Nick looked away from her to avoid the look she was giving him. "You won't like it Miranda," he told her telling her all she needed to know really.

Confirming what she had suspected but didn't want to admit or say out loud. He had cheated on her and all the rumors were true.

"Tell me anyway," Miranda told him refusing to back down. Knowing in the end she was going to regret things. "Who were you fucking last night?" she asked him with an arched eyebrow.

"Just some chick I met at a bar," Nick revealed and Miranda wasn't sure if his words did anything to comfort her. Knowing he had slept with a stranger. "I knew she knew who I was and obviously was a fan of my modeling stuff and I was upset with you and I just..I needed something."

Laughing bitterly Miranda watched as Nick finally looked at her and not once did he look sorry. "You needed something?" she asked him unable to even believe his words.

"I was angry I didn't know what else to do okay," Nick replied as if that explained everything. "What would you have done in this situation? Someone who knows you and clearly wants you and your upset but also horny?" he asked as if he expected Miranda to say she'd cheat.

As if he thought so low of her which he probably did since he got so jealous over Taylor and he'd gotten jealous over other men too.

Miranda shook her head as she crossed her arms, "I would have said no," she told him almost spitting the words out.

A part of her feeling so fucking angry that he'd think she would have cheated on him if the roles had been reversed.

"So if it were Taylor you would have said no so easily?" Nick questioned and his words were enough to get Miranda's blood boiling. "You really would have said no to the fucking faggot Hanson brother?" he asked her again and the way he asked her that she wanted to slap him or punch him.

She didn't though. She kept herself composed as she took a few deep breaths. Uncrossing her arms as she walked even closer to the table and when she reached it she rested her hands down on the cool surface. Leaning in until she was looking right into Nick's eyes.

"I would have said no," she told him surprised by her own venom and he must have been too if the hard swallow he did of his coffee was any indication. "Now please leave my hotel room so that I can get my stuff together and leave too."

"Where will you go?" Nick asked her as he stood from the chair. "Last I checked you lived with me so you'll have to see me again when you get home."

Shaking her head Miranda sighed because he had here there. She lived with him and all of her stuff was at his place. Eventually she'd have to return to it and see him when she did.  
"I'll think of something," Miranda told him keeping her words short. Nick only giving her a condescending look before he threw the cup away that had held his coffee and after he had done that he seemed to for once obey what Miranda wanted from him.

Grabbing what was his and leaving her room effortlessly. Leaving her with the feeling that she'd eventually have a more difficult time when she went to get her things from his place.

Feeling like when she did he'd try to worm his way back into whatever small space she still held for him in her heart and now Miranda was second guessing her thoughts on not giving cheaters a second chance.

Not sure if she'd find someone who actually wanted her in the ways Nick had. Even if his ways were fucked up.

After he was gone Miranda sat in the chair across from the one Nick had been occupying and she sighed heavily as she crossed her arms on the table, leaning her head against it.

"Happy fucking Valentine's Day to me," she muttered to herself.

*****

"You can't just take him back Mimi," Juliet spoke from the other end of the line. Miranda having called her once she had gotten her wits about her and decided to reserve this hotel room for one more day.

At least to give herself some time away from Nick before getting her stuff tomorrow.

"I know that Juliet," Miranda told her sister because of course she knew she couldn't just take Nick back but saying that was easy. "I just know when I do see him again he's going to use the same charms he used when he was romancing me."

Juliet scoffed at that, "You mean when he was just being a douche to get in your pants," she told her and her sister's words made Miranda blush. "I mean he stopped being nice and saying sweet things the minute he knew you were his and had slept with him."

"That's not true," Miranda argued but she knew it was. She had told Juliet as much.

It was a fact that sometimes made her regret being so open with her baby sister. Not sure if other sister's were as open as they were when it came to each other's love lives.

Then again she also felt like the past few years they had stopped too. In little ways anyway and it was all because of Miranda's busy life she knew.

"Yes it is," Juliet told her matter of factly. "Even mom knows it is and speaking of her she'd kill you if you took Nick back. You know she would."

Miranda had to bite her tongue at that. Had to keep from saying that in the end their mom wouldn't be the best person to kill her over giving a cheater another chance. How often had her own mom been a doormat for her dad before he finally left?

Too often for Miranda to count.

Of course she knew better than to say that. Didn't want to upset the mother she loved even if she hated some of her decisions. Decisions that she may follow after in the end.

"I know she would," Miranda sighed softly as she closed her eyes briefly. Almost wishing that she were anywhere but in this mess.

Wishing she hadn't met Nick at all or fallen for his nice words and good looks. Those were always the wrong things to do but she had been young and in love.

She was still young but not as much in love. Just wanted to be wanted in the end if she were honest.

"Look I have to go," Miranda spoke again knowing she just needed to get off the phone. Knew her sister would know she was just going because she didn't want to talk about this anymore. "I have to call Prue and ask if she wants a roommate for a while."

Juliet only laughed making Miranda wonder what was so funny. "You know I'm surprised you and Prue are still friends," she spoke so casually like she hadn't even heard Miranda saying she had to go. "She always seemed like a snake waiting for the right time to pounce."

"Well she's not Juliet," Miranda muttered. "She's one of the best friends I have in my life and I really need to go," she said one last time before hanging up on her sister.

The moment after she did she felt awful for it but the last thing she needed was a lecture on how awful it would be for her to take Nick back or even a conversation about the surprising revelation that her sister had never trusted Prue.

It was again another reminder to her that she really truly was losing the closeness she once had with her sister and it hurt. It was also the last thing she needed today.

Frowning she did her best to ignore her guilt as she did what she told Juliet she was going to do. Call Prue and ask to move in with her.

The last thing she needed today was to be a liar to a sister who she felt like she was slowly losing. Not after finding out her boyfriend was really a cheating asshole who she stubbornly wanted to cling to just to be wanted.

It was pathetic really and she knew that. Which is why as she dialed Prue's number she prayed for the strength not to fall for Nick's words when she went to get her stuff tomorrow.


	6. Picture To Burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _So watch me strike a match_   
>  _On all my wasted time_   
>  _As far as I'm concerned you're_   
>  _Just another picture to burn-"Picture To Burn" by Taylor Swift  
> _

2/15/11

Sitting in her car outside of the house she shared with Nick, Miranda chewed her lip softly. A part of her dreading getting out of the car though she knew Nick was gone. Had under the advisement of Prue texted Nick to set up a time when he wouldn't be here.

Miranda knowing if he was here he'd be convincing her to stay and she was afraid she'd give in. Knew he could say the right words as easy as he could be an asshole.

Just like Miranda was convinced no one would want her as much as Nick did. No other man would surely be able to cope with the crazy schedule she lived with.

Taking a deep breath, Miranda finally worked up the courage to get out of the car. Heading inside and letting her breath out as she was greeted with a silent house. She didn't even feel Nick's imposing presence that he exuded even without being around her.

That was enough to let her know he really was gone. He hadn't stayed to try to convince her to not go. Which maybe he wanted her gone.

Nick could have known like she did this relationship was running it's course even if she didn't want to give up easy just because of fear.

Fear which Miranda knew was irrational but it was what it was in the end.

Making it to the bedroom where majority of her stuff was at Miranda paused in the doorway as she made a face when her eyes landed on the bed. A small sigh escaping her lips because even though Nick wasn't here it seemed he had left her a gift.

A small stuffed teddy bear as well as a note laying beside it.

Slowly she willed herself to move to the bed where she picked up the teddy bear. Smiling in spite of herself because it was sweet even if she knew this wouldn't change things. It was just a gift to win her over for now and she couldn't fall into the trap just to have him burn her again.

No what she needed to do was get her stuff and leave. Go to Prue's house and get drunk. Burning all the damn pictures she had of Nick.

That would make Miranda feel better than taking Nick back because he gave her a teddy bear and wrote her what she assumed was a sweet note. She refused to even read it.

Knowing if she read it that it would probably make her stay which was the last thing she wanted or needed. She needed to keep some of her self-respect and dignity.

So what she did was lay the teddy bear back down and walk to the closet to get her suitcases so that she could pack her stuff. Close the chapter that was Nick in her book of life and start a new one that he wasn't in.

A chapter he'd never be back in if she could help it because despite what she wanted to do she knew she was better than that. She could indeed learn from her mother's mistakes.

That and maybe in the end she didn't want to disappoint her sister or Prue who had told her when she called her last night that she'd be angry if Miranda took Nick back. Which was why Prue had suggested she do all this when Nick was gone.

So that her best friend wouldn't be tempted and Miranda was really lucky to have Prue. Even if things were still off between them because of the Taylor thing last month.

*****

Miranda sighed as she looked at all her suitcases on the floor. All of them now full of her things and she felt dread at the thought of the trips she'd have to make back into the house because there was no way she could get everything out in one go.

But before she could even leave the bedroom to begin lugging he suitcases out to her car her cell phone rang and she reached into the pocket of her jeans where she kept the phone. Pulling it out to see Nick's name on the screen and she knew she shouldn't answer it but she did.

"Hello?" she asked feeling apprehension at the thought of talking to him.

"You still at our house Miranda?" he questioned her sounding hopeful.

Miranda knew he probably was hopeful. Hopeful that she had fallen for his gift and the letter she still hadn't read. Though she had been tempted too as she packed her stuff away.

She hadn't broken so far though and she refused to break now. She wasn't going to read the letter.

"I am but I have all my stuff packed. Just need to get it all to my car so I can leave. I'm sure if I don't get to Prue's she'll send a search party for me."

Now it was Nick who sighed. The disappointment apparent.

"So you're still following through with the childish idea of leaving me over one mistake?" Nick questioned her sounding personally offended.

Miranda finding that funny because he had no reason to be personally offended after everything. He was the one who cheated on her.

"It's not childish," Miranda defended hating that she was even having to defend this decision. "You cheated on me Nick," she spoke having to bite her tongue to keep from accusing him of what the tabloids said.

Knew she couldn't just accuse him of doing it more than once.

It would start an argument even longer than this would be and she didn't have the time for that. Not when today was already emotionally taxing for her.

Having to leave her first boyfriend, her first love it was hard. Even if the relationship had always been slightly toxic.

"It was one time Miranda," Nick spat out as if he could read her mind. Like he knew she suspected it wasn't. "I made a mistake and I bought you a gift and wrote you a letter and that should be enough to show you how sorry I am."

Shaking her head Miranda refused to let herself crumble. She had to be strong, remind herself cheaters didn't get a second chance.

Maybe if she was someone else and she hadn't seen her mom go through what she had but she wasn't someone else and she had.

Taking a breath Miranda sat down on the bed, "I never read the letter and I don't intend too," she started as she swallowed hard. "As for the bear it doesn't change things. One time is still a pretty big damn mistake Nick and I'm not going to be your fool you keep doing this too and winning over with gifts. I can't," she muttered before moving her phone away from her ear and ending the call.

Effectively ending the conversation before he could say more. Pocketing her cell phone once more she stood from the bed then.

Knowing she really had to hurry now and get her stuff to her car. She was afraid if she didn't she'd still be here when Nick got home. Figured he was already on his way since he knew his gift and letter hadn't worked.

*****

"You know," Miranda slurred as she looked at Prue as they went through an old photo album of her and Nick later that night. "We should burn all his damn pictures," she laughed before laying her head on Prue's shoulder. "It'd be better therapy than drinking wine and just looking at the damn pictures."

Prue laughed too, her head softly resting against Miranda's. "I doubt that will make you feel better," she spoke and even in her half drunken state Miranda knew she was right. "Maybe for right now but not later."

"Why do you have to be right Prudence," Miranda whined her voice still slurring.

"Because I'm sober," Prue reminded her and Miranda just glared even if Prue couldn't see her.

So instead she fell silent. Just letting the silence envelope them for awhile. Knowing she felt like she wanted more whine but not wanting to even get up to get it. She really was a pitiful sight right now and she was almost glad that for the next few months she'd be in the studio making a new album.

She was sure this break up with Nick would inspire her.

"Do you think I should call Taylor and ask him to work on the new album with me?" Miranda asked feeling Prue bristle some at her words and once again Miranda was reminded Taylor was a sore subject with them.

Prue was still angry that she had supposedly stolen Taylor's attention away from her that night. Even if Prue had mysteriously disappeared before that even happened.

"No," Prue answered as she lifted her head. "I think that would be a mistake for you to do."

Scrunching up her nose, Miranda eyed Prue, "Because you want him and you're afraid I'll rebound with him if we work together?" she asked knowing she was being more forward than she'd normally be but she was drunk.

She'd only ever be this forward with Prue while drunk.

"Sort of yeah," Prue confessed as she looked away with Miranda with a blush. "You just get all the guys and I want this one," she admitted sounding like she was being really vulnerable and maybe she was. "We're even going out for drinks this Friday," she revealed her words shocking Miranda because she hadn't known this before.

Hated that she felt slightly jealous because of it too. She shouldn't be jealous.

Taylor was just an ex-celebrity crush that she had a great conversation with last month and who she hadn't heard from again until her win the other night. He was nothing more and nothing less and Miranda would let Prue have him.

"Okay," she smiled softly even though it killed her. "You can have Taylor and I'll just leave it be," she reassured her. Knowing she wouldn't do anything to hurt Prue's chances with him.

She was a good best friend in the end.


	7. Stupid Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Well she was precious, like a flower_   
>  _She grew wild, wild but innocent_   
>  _A perfect prayer in a desperate hour_   
>  _She was everything beautiful and different_   
>  _Stupid boy, you can't fence that in_   
>  _Stupid boy, it's like holdin' back the wind_
> 
>  
> 
> _She laid her heart and soul right in your hands_   
>  _And you stole her every dream, and you crushed her plans_   
>  _She never even knew she had a choice_   
>  _And that's what happens when the only voice she hears is telling her she can't_   
>  _Stupid boy_   
>  _Stupid boy-"Stupid Boy" by Keith Urban  
> _

2/19/11

"I can't believe him," Miranda grumbled to herself as she stood in Prue's kitchen days later. Her eyes almost wanting to cross as she looked down at the cell phone in her hand. Reading over the story that was being run by one of the many gossip websites.

Nick had the audacity to go to a gossip website and got them to run an article on how she was to blame for their break up. How he had supposedly heard she was cheating on him.

Miranda knew where most people's minds would go. They'd remember the articles about her and Taylor.

Nick had done this on purpose to ruin her image and maybe Taylor's as well. It would be just like him, especially since he had seemed so jealous of Taylor.

When in the end it was Nick's own fault he had lost her. It wasn't her fault and it wasn't Taylor's. The blame was solely on Nick and Nick alone.

After all this break up was one which was a long time coming. The cheating had just given her an easy out. Made it easier for her to cut ties even if she still had feelings for Nick.

Feelings that were starting to sour considerably after this piece of garbage article.

"You can't believe who?" Prue piped up from where she sat at the kitchen table. Not looking the best in the world but then again she had been out drinking with Taylor last night.

A fact that Miranda wanted to forget for her own reasons. Just like she wanted to forget that she had agreed to let Prue have a shot with him.

It was something she could do for her best friend. Be nice and let her have a chance with the boy who had been her childhood celebrity crush.

Hell, Miranda wasn't even sure if she stood a chance with him anyway.

"Nick," Miranda sighed as she walked towards the table, holding her phone out so Prue could read the article. "He sold a story blaming me for the break up," she revealed more details after Prue had taken her phone.

The kitchen falling silent as Prue read over the article that Miranda's asshole ex had sold.

Miranda almost wondering how much he had made for that pile of shit. Then again, she almost didn't want to know. She just wanted to find a way to get revenge for it.

Revenge for her would more than likely be writing a song about Nick. Letting everyone know what a liar he was.

Prue only shook her head as she handed the phone back to Miranda, "Well, he is a typical guy. Last I checked all of them were assholes," she told her and her reply made Miranda pause.

Mainly because of how bitter Prue had sounded when she said what she did.

"The date with Taylor not go well last night?" Miranda asked cautiously as she took her phone from Prue's hand. Slowly moving to sit down at the table in case she had to comfort her best friend. She was really good at giving comfort hugs.

"That would be understatement," Prue replied with a shake of her head. "I'd rather not talk about it though," she said as she turned to give Miranda a tight lipped smile.

Nodding Miranda laid her phone down on the table. "Okay, we won't talk about it," she told her even if she was dying too.

She just wanted to know what was so bad that Prue now no longer saw Taylor in a good light. Even more so since Miranda still secretly wanted to take Taylor up on the offer of writing together.

"You want too though," Prue stated as if she could read Miranda's mind and maybe she could with all the years of friendship they had under the belt.

Again Miranda nodded her head. Though she didn't say anything verbally.

"Maybe tonight over a glass of wine," Prue spoke in her silence. "Just not while I'm sober," she laughed though it was an uneasy laugh. "Alcohol always makes things easier to talk about."

"We can do that Prue or we can just not talk about it. Whichever is good for you."

Prue once again laughed her uneasy laugh. "I know you Randa. You'll want to know so we'll do it tonight over wine okay," she spoke though it sounded like she truly didn't want to talk about it and Miranda felt awful.

She felt like somehow even though she had gave Prue an out she was forcing her hand. Her best friend knew she wanted the details so she'd give them even if she was uncomfortable doing so.

"Fine," Miranda sighed softly not wanting to keep going in circles about this. "If you say so," she added on before standing from the table and picking her phone up. "I think I'm going to shower and go to the studio. Try to get some writing done for the next album," she said hoping Prue didn't see her words for what they were.

They were just a way for her to get out of the house and away from Prue. Didn't want to be around her best friend right now because she was feeling awful for opening a fresh wound again.

"Have fun," Prue replied so casually like she hadn't detected that Miranda was lying which was a relief to Miranda.

Forcing a smile Miranda turned on her heel and left to get ready for the day.

*****

Sighing to herself as she sipped on her ice coffee, Miranda looked down at the empty notebook pages. Not sure why words were alluding her right now but they were.

Then again maybe it was because she was trying to write in a busy Starbucks while hoping she didn't get noticed by fans or even that the paparazzi didn't show up. Because after the articles Nick had sold she really didn't want to be seen.

Was afraid of what all could be said about her by fans or even in the tabloids if there were pictures taken of her today.

It would be better for her to actually be in the studio, that she knew but she was lazy. That and usually she did her best writing in coffee shops, not in a studio.

"Just get yourself in a an angry mood," Miranda muttered to herself as she pulled out her cell phone. Pulling up the article she had been reading this morning and hoping it worked to get her in a bad mood.

The right mindset she would need to write a song about Nick. Just wanting to get her anger about Nick that way as well as maybe her pent up agitation at the way things had went with Prue this morning.

That conversation a stark reminder that she really needed to get her own place soon. Because as much as she loved Prue they could also butt heads badly.

As she kept looking over the article, finding bits that particularly got to her. She felt like maybe she was in the right head space. That maybe she could put pen to paper and get lyrics written down but right as she picked up her pen she heard someone say her name and she felt her body freeze as she looked at the empty seat across from her.

Watching as Taylor sat down across from her like it was nothing and the world must have really hated her.

Taylor was the last person she wanted to see right now.

"Taylor," she spoke as she once again for the second time today pasted on a fake smile. "How nice to see you," she lied and at least with him she was sure he couldn't see through her lies.

It wasn't like he had known her all her damn life.

"No, it isn't," Taylor told her though he didn't look offended by that realization. "Your fake smile gives you away," he told her so casually which left Miranda wondering if he could tell that because he was the same way.

That was the only plausible explanation.

"Sorry," Miranda apologized and at least that was the truth. "Just you found me when I was trying to write a song and the lyrics are just failing me. Nothing wants to come and usually coffee shops help me write. Today though, it's like my muse or whatever has left me high and dry."

Taylor laughed at that, he actually had the audacity to laugh. Miranda almost wanting to glare at him but she didn't.

Instead she took a really long sip of her iced coffee.

"I've been there before," Taylor told her once his laughing had died down. "The best cure for that I have found is just getting in the car and going for a drive with the windows rolled down. Just you, the music, and a few good back roads that you can get lost on."

Miranda raised an eyebrow at Taylor's words, "You're sure that works?" she asked him sounding almost weary of his words.

Though maybe she'd try it. At this rate she'd try anything just to write something.

"Positive," Taylor replied with a smile that Miranda hated did funny things to her stomach like making it flip upside down. "You should try it," he told her before standing up as casually as he sat down. "Let me know if it works and if it doesn't well you can just text me angrily and let me know it didn't."

Rolling her eyes playfully Miranda just gave him a small smile as she nodded her head. "Okay," she told him with a nod of her head. "I'll do that," she agreed as she stood up from where she was sitting.

Picking up her stuff she followed Taylor outside. Both of them parting ways without words once they were outside.

Getting in her car, Miranda started it up, pulling out of her parking space as she rolled the windows down and turned the radio up. Deciding to play her sad country song playlist. Hoping that it would also help with bringing her muse back.

If it didn't though, well, she was looking forward to angrily texting Taylor. Maybe Nick too since it was Nick she wanted to write about.

That and Nick deserved an angry text from her after just being a general asshole in her life for so long.


	8. Cowboy Casanova

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _He's a good time cowboy Casanova_   
>  _Leaning up against the record machine_   
>  _Looks like a cool drink of water_   
>  _But he's candy-coated misery_   
>  _He's the devil in disguise_   
>  _A snake with blue eyes_   
>  _And he only comes out at night_   
>  _Gives you feelings that you don't want to fight_   
>  _You better run for your life-"Cowboy Casanova" by Carrie Underwood_

2/19/11

"So how did songwriting go?" Prue asked as she sat beside Miranda on the floor. The both of them drinking cheap wine in expensive wine glasses.

The episode of Friends they had been watching had just ended and Miranda felt Prue had asked that question to keep Miranda from asking about how Friday had went with Taylor because that had been what she had been doing all night.

Asking Miranda questions in between them starting new episodes of Friends.

"It started off crappy, nothing wanted to come at first but then this little devil sat on my shoulder and gave me some advice," Miranda shrugged as she took a long drink of her wine.

There was no way she could tell Prue that she had seen Taylor. But maybe doing so would actually get her best friend to talk about what had went so wrong last night.

"And the advice from this mysterious devil worked?" Prue asked skeptically, her brown eyes growing wide.

Miranda nodded her head with a smile, "It did actually," she admitted because driving around with windows rolled down had inspired a song about being another picture to burn.

It was a song that would take her back to her country roots but maybe that was a good thing for just one song on the album? Enough to get her pent up hatred or dislike for Nick out there as well as for people to see her side of things.

To know he wasn't a nice person no matter what he accused her of.

"But enough about me," Miranda said before Prue could start another episode of Friends. "Tell me about last night because I want to know and you said you'd tell me."

Prue sighed at that, looking away from Miranda as she took a few small sips of her wine. Miranda wishing she was a mind reader.

Wishing she knew what was going on in her best friends head right at this very moment.

"Let's just say I wanted more from Taylor than he wanted to give," Prue answered as she finally looked back at Miranda. "I wanted something serious and he saw Friday as just two friends hanging out for drinks."

Frowning Miranda reached over as she pulled Prue into her. "I'm sorry Prue," she murmured kissing her best friend on the forehead. "I'm really fucking sorry because I saw how much you were crushing on him," she admitted.

Miranda only being able to see it because pathetically she had been the same way. But Prue's words let her know Taylor wasn't looking for anything serious right now and anyway Miranda didn't need that. Her relationship with Nick was still fresh and yeah just no.

Not to mention Taylor was off limits. She had promised Prue and even if Taylor didn't want Prue it was still a promise and she didn't like breaking promises to friends.

"The good news is you can write with Taylor now if you want," Prue said as she lifted her head some. "I know you really wanted too."

Shaking her head Miranda forced a smile, "I'm not going to write with the guy who broke my best friends heart," she told her the words tasting like acid in her mouth.

Because despite everything she kind of did want to do just that. She wanted to write with Taylor, especially after the advice he had given her after the accidental run in today.

Miranda already picturing them in a car, driving down backroads as they came up with song ideas for her or for him.

But that's all they were. Pictures in her head that would never happen because she was a good best friend or so she told herself still.

"You're a good best friend Randa," Prue muttered and the living room fell silent. Miranda just holding Prue to her as they drank their wine.

Neither moving to start the next episode of Friends.

*****

That night as she sat in her room after getting ready for bed, Miranda who had been trying to read a book on her kindle but failed because of the alcohol in her system still. Raised an eyebrow as she heard her cell phone ringing.

Her eyes looking at the clock by her bed which let her know it was past midnight and she wasn't sure who'd be calling now.

Despite her better judgement she laid her kindle down and reached for her phone. Feeling her eyebrows go higher when she saw Taylor's name on her caller id and she was sure the world really hated her.

Especially after her conversation with Prue because she knew the meaning ran deeper than just not writing with him. For the sake of girl code she should just cut Taylor out of her life.

Stop whatever weird acquaintanceship this was that they were building.

But again despite her better judgement she hit talk, putting the phone to her ear.

"Hello?" she asked with a curiosity because deep down she was curious.

Curious why Taylor was calling her so late. Why he chose tonight of all fucking nights, like he had some sort of built in radar to let him know Miranda had put him in a no friend zone.

"Hello there My little songbird," Taylor's voice greeted her more happily than someone should be at this time of night. "I was just calling to see if my advice I gave you helped."

"At twelve forty-five in the morning?" Miranda asked a bit harshly because for all he knew she could have been sleeping.

A thought that was laughable because her lifestyle made any kind of sleeping routine almost impossible for her.

"You were actually sleeping?" Taylor questioned like he knew her, something that made Miranda want to hate him even more but could she really?

She still saw him through her ex-celebrity crush rose colored glasses it seemed.

"No," she admitted as she shook her head though he couldn't see her. "And yeah your writing advice helped. Better than I thought it would actually."

"That's good," Taylor said sounding genuinely honest. "Maybe that means you wouldn't be opposed to writing with me soon?" he asked though there was something else in his voice.

Something that let her know he meant more than just writing.

Miranda sighed as she sat up some more in her bed. "Why do I get the feeling you want more than just to write with me?" she asked him not giving him any kind of answer yet.

She wouldn't give him anything until she knew his intentions.

"Busted," Taylor spoke with a laugh. "Annie was really wanting to hang out with you again as well, you remember her right?"

"Zac's girlfriend?"

"Yeah, so I told her I'd call and find a way to invite you over to the place Zac and I share and using writing together sounded like the perfect excuse."

Miranda laughed not even sure if it was the appropriate response but it felt like one. It truly did even if maybe being mad would have been better.

"Can I think about it?" she asked knowing she needed time.

She had fucking told Prue she wouldn't tonight and if she was going to betray that promise, well, she needed time to live with it.

"Take all the time you need songbird," Taylor told her and Miranda blushed at him using that nickname for a second time now.

It seemed neither of them had much else to say after that. Both hanging up around the same time seconds after and Miranda sighed as she laid her phone down.

Her mind torn between two different things. Wanting to go and hang out with Taylor and write as well as to see Zac and Annie again because she had gotten on well with them and also wanting to be a good friend and keep her word to Prue.

Avoid the boy who had broken her best friends heart.

She knew what the easiest choice would be, but she had never made anything easy for herself ever.


End file.
